Unanswered Questions: Gossip Girl Recap - 3/8 Episode

We're baaaaaack!  Finally, after a long absence, GG has returned!  I won't leave you in suspense any longer, let's jump right into the recap of what left me perplexed at the end of this episode:

• Why was Lily so afraid to tell Rufus what she did?  Was it ideal?  No, but it wasn't awful.  Her Mom was dying and he's the father of her kids and apparently a shamen who can cure the aforementioned dying mother.  She's allowed.
• If everyone could see the pill jacket lying on the ground in the coat check, couldn't they all see Nate and Serena doin the dirty?  Coat checks are simply not that large.
• Violette switched the jacket, not the dress - can someone explain why S had to walk out like a flasher, completely nude underneath a coat?
• Blair, what happened to that ruthless spirit we all love and adore?  That was your full attempt at cracking the Chuck Bass Mother Mystery?  That kinda sounds like the title of a Hardy Boys novel.
• Why is Serena staying at the Waldorf's?  Eleanor moves to Paris and lets a college dropout live in her penthouse when said dropout's family has an equally large penthouse?  I don't think so.
• Did anyone picture the moment when Damien picks up Serena?  "Hi.  I'm here to take you to a ball, and I'd like to give you a sweater that you should wear tonight."  That's awkward.  Anything other than flowers on a first date is highly suspicious.
• Who else had flashbacks to the Da Vinci Code as Jenny pieces together her drug smuggling plot via newspaper clippings?  At least she had better hair than Tom Hanks.
• If Serena hasn't seen Damien in, say, 3 years, why would she say "Text me your number"?  If you don't have his, what makes you think he'd have yours?  Oh, I forgot; you're that cool.
• Why does Dan tell Rufus to make his own waffles, like that's some sort of punishment?  Dan was making Eggos.  That's not difficult.
• Since when is there a jeweler/patient confidentiality agreement? 

It feels good to be back.