Unanswered Questions: Gossip Girl Recap - 1/31/11 Episode

So I'm sure the first unanswered question on your minds is Where is last week's recap?  The answer is that I thought it was a little too lame to write about.  Sorry, writers, but I expected a little more from you for the first episode back after a break.  Enough about last week.  It seems our Gossip Girl buddies were back to their old tricks this week, which means I'm back to ask some more pressing questions.

• At first I thought the W assistant's name was Everly...as in Beverly minus the B.  Thankfully, I realized I was wrong.  Phew.  It's not Everly; it's Epperly.  But what kind of a name is Epperly?
• Perhaps the Thorpes want to exploit the Captain's connections, but did they forget he's been in prison the last few years for making some pretty atrocious financial decisions?  The Captain argues with Nate saying "I'm good at what I do!" though I'm guessing the New York state penal system would disagree.
• While Blair is telling Dan why she needs the internship, she says her Mom is just a famous designer which means she can't call in favors to a fashion magazine...um isn't that exactly what it means to be a famous designer?
• Lily is concerned when she finds out Eric could not have been staying at Eliot's place after she's informed they broke up.  But why is Lily ok with her high school son sleeping at his boyfriend's apartment?
• Hot pink hot pants in February with no tights...really?  Don't get me wrong, they were kinda cute, but we all know Blair is not big on shorts/pants and it's still the dead of winter here in NYC.  That outfit doesn't work when there's snow on the ground.  Sorry.
• Does Serena own any formal dresses that don't have side cut-outs?  It's like if she doesn't hit her skin showing quota, she dies.
• Blair's working the door at the party?  I'm impressed because that's actually the kind of task an intern would handle and that level of reality somehow shocks me on this show.  I also relish seeing this because I know that as a gal who works in print advertising, I am one of the people she would be checking in.  Ha!
• A drinking game based around every time Lily pays someone off...why didn't I think of that?!?!